Went to the clinic. Daphs was all smiles. We played with her Caterpillar plush toy as we waited.
We were called back.
The nurse checked her heart rate and we weighed her.
10 pounds even. Up 8 ounces from a week and a half ago.
The nurse left and I excitedly waited for the doctor to come in.
After a few minutes of waiting, she came in. Here’s how it went down:
“You guys doing ok? How’s Daphne?”
“We are good!”
“Great. Well, it looks like there was no change from last week– She dropped from the 6th percentile to the 4th percentile.”
“Wait…how can that be? She weighed 9lbs 8oz last week…” It was now that I realized I would have a lot of questions for the doctor. I did my absolute best to maintain a calm and collected disposition.
“My numbers show she was still 4.31 kg today,” She said while pointing to the computer, the dreaded chart.
“How can those two numbers be the same when she’s a different weight this week? She’s a different weight this week,” I said.
“Yep. Want to weigh her again?”
So we weighed her again, #2 for today. 10 pounds again.
“Hm. Well, my computer still shows no change.”
“Okay..Well, can it be that Daphne is just a small baby?
I just stared at her.
“I guess I shouldn’t say No. Babies show patterns of growth. I would have expected Daphne to stay in the 50-60th percentile, but she hasn’t,” commented the doctor.
“Oh.. okay..well, can I see a nutritionist? Would that help?”
She shook her head sadly and said “No, they’ll just have you feed her in front of them and then tell you to do what you’re doing.”
“What about a growth specialist? I mean, if this is an issue, maybe a growth specialist would help,” I commented.
To which she replied “WIC really is the best one.”
I said “Oh, well I’ve already seen them and they didn’t really offer help. They just told me that it seems like a latch issue and gave me the SNS. I’ve been using that.”
“Every other feeding. She might take half an ounce, she might take 2 ounces. She doesn’t seem to be taking a lot lately.”
“Hm. Well, when we refer people out to see specialists, they usually just have you feed her in front of them. That’s about it, not much change.”
“Are you still taking fenugreek?”
“Yes, but not as religiously. My supply has increased since I’ve changed my diet.” I shifted Daphs from one hip to the next.
“Are you pumping?”
“After every feeding, yes,” I said. “Perhaps I should look into pumping exclusively so that I know exactly how much she’s taking in?”
“Well, we don’t have to look into that option for a while, unless you want to. I think we need to schedule one more weight check for early next week…after that…” she trailed off.
“I can do that. ”
“Yea, it’s just that since she got sick, that dropped her weight again. We just want to see it get back up,” she said.
“Right.” Daphne started fussing in my arms.
“The next option may be to supplement her SNS with some high calorie formula.
“I know I’m being wishy washy,” she started, “and thank you for your patience. I just want to make sure we get this under control.”
“Let’s schedule one more weight check for early next week.”
So, I started packing Daphs up. I had her strapped in when the doctor popped her head back into the exam room.
She asked “Which scale did we weigh Daphne on last week?”
“I don’t remember…we’ve switched scales in here quite a few times. Do you want to weigh her again?”
“Yeah, let’s try the other scale.”
We walked to the next exam room and weighed her on that scale. She weighed 9lbs 14oz on that one.
The doctor commented, “Hm.. well I was hoping it’d show a different number. Okay. I’ll see you next week!”
“Sounds good.” I started dressing Daphs again and headed out to the front to make another weight check appointment for next week.
I don’t even know how to take the appointment. Daphne has indeed gained weight! She weighed 9lbs 8 oz on the 20th (a week and a half ago) and now weighs 10 pounds. She’s gaining…but just isn’t gaining as much or fast as the doctor wants?
I’ve done so much…I don’t know what else I can do.
The only advice she seems to give is to keep doing what I am doing. Doing the same thing over again and expecting different results is the definition of stupidity, right?
So here I sit…watching Daphs bounce in her bouncer…wondering what the heck I’m supposed to do.
See another doctor?
Just keep doing what I am doing?
Supplement with formula?
I just don’t know. I … just … don’t … know.
I think what I don’t understand is her aversion to sending me to a nutritionist or a growth specialist. Not only that, but that she doesn’t think it is possible for me to have a small baby–when all other signs point otherwise.